WHAT THE VENTI??

Written February 07, 2008

OK, so I did it. . .today was the day. . .as many times as I swore I would not do it, I did! Standing at the counter at the Starbucks in my Kroger's store (yeah, amazing where these things pop up!), I ordered the largest coffee they have and actually said the word. . .Venti!! I swore for a long time I would never do that. I resisted with everything in me. . . "I'll have the largest you got." I'd say in a somewhat rebellious tone, as if even though I am drinking the coffee in the one-of-a-kind cups with the handy little sleeve, AND paying 4 bucks for it, I would still not join the ranks of those people who proudly parade themselves around with their to-go cups, looking more important than they are. But I said it!! The word that, by uttering it, somehow makes you an official part of this crazy 4-bucks-a-cup coffee drinkers "club". I just know it does! I never had a problem with their medium cup, a Grande'. . .I could say "Grande'" I mean any woman who has ever shopped for clothes outside of the junior department knows what that word is! But "Venti". . . ohhhhhh boy. . .

Let's go back a few years. About 10 years ago or maybe a little more, I was on a visit to a hospital to minister to a family whose loved one was having surgery. I had been to other hospitals in the area doing this work, but this one was new to me. As my ministry partner and I walked into the lobby, there it was! A coffee bar!! I had never seen one before! It resembled many of the bars (the drinking ones) I had been in years ago. The mirror behind a shelf full of big glass bottles with fancy labels, neon lights adding some allure to the place. I was a coffee drinker already, and was totally enthralled by what I was seeing. My friend asked me if I wanted to stop and get something. . . sure! Why not? I saw "Esspresso" on the menu and wondered if that meant they made it real fast, or you drink it real fast? My friend laughed and told me that it was just a strong kind of coffee. Stronger? HA! I was the one who added two extra scoops of Folgers to my coffee maker in the morning! I'll show you stronger!! So I got one! A DOUBLE! By the time we reached the patients room I had finished my coffee. We ministered to the family, prayed with them and headed back to the parking garage. I kept noticing that my friend was lagging behind me as we made our way down the long halls of the hospital. "Are you OK?" I asked her, "You are going kind of slow." She laughed at me and told me she would need to be running to keep up with my pace! "No, I'm not going that fast! Do you really think I am walking that fast? Because I thought you were walking slow and I was wondering why you were slowing down because I thought maybe you felt bad and if you felt bad all you had to do was tell me and I would slow down or we could stop and sit, or you could stop and sit and I could go get the car and . . . " My heart was absolutely racing!! I was going 100+ miles an hour!! On the way home I would have sworn that I could have gotten out of the car and ran faster than the car was going all the way home!!

To say the least that was my first and last experience with this unusual coffee world for years to come! Oh sure I had known folks who always had a gourmet coffee in their hand, but secretly laughed at them for having such a stupid obsession. I mean I experimented with it that day at the hospital and it didn't really do much for me except speed things up for a while.

Then about 6 months ago my husband and I picked up a cleaning contract with Barnes and Nobel. Well, little did I know that they had a cafe' in the bookstore which serves Starbucks coffee!! So, here and there I was offered coffees to try and it did not take long before I was hooked! Around the holidays I fell in love with the Peppermint Mocha. . .only to have my dreams dashed to pieces when Christmas passed and the Peppermint Mocha went back to wherever the special falvored coffees go when it is not their season. I mean, what is this?? It's not fruit or something!! It's a flavor for goodness sake!! (OK I might still be a little bitter). So, I went back to my Cafe' Mocha. Oh I tried the other flavors, but nothing captured my tastebuds like the Peppermint Mocha~till next Christmas my friend. . . .

OH! Err. . . .so anyway, The more time I spent around the cafe's and coffee bars, the more terminology I heard. . ."dirty chai". . . what's that? Do they drop your drink on the floor and suck it up? No, I found out it is a type of tea with a shot of espresso in it. . .Oh come on! Do you want coffee or tea? Make up your mind!! No way I will ever be one of THOSE people with all their terminology. Cafe' Mocha was good enough for me!! I also started hearing people call for double shots! SHOTS? What is this a bar?? Oh yeah. . . it kind of is, isn't it? TWO shots of espresso?? Ohhhhhohohohhhhooooo, I have been there and done tha! NO WAY I will ever do THAT again!! I remember the day I overheard an order that took my breath away. . .and apparantly it did the same for everyone in the Cafe', because every head turned to see who it was that made the order and there was a gasp in the crowd followed by a hush that would make a monk nervous! A dirty chai. . . QUAD SHOT!! Quad shot??? Who the heck does a quad shot?? I never knew anyone to do that with whiskey, let alone esspresso!! The woman must have grown used to the response because she turned to everyone around her and said, "I know, I know. . .it's for my husband." Hmmmm, but he was nowhere to be seen. . . Maybe he was climbing the walls somewhere in the bookstore??

Well, of course then I started getting "cravings" for the stuff. Like getting a "fix", I would send my husband down the street to Krogers to get me a Cafe' Mocha! I am guilty of contributing to getting my step-daughter hooked on Cinnamon Dolce' (which is dreamy by the way!)
Which brings us to today. The day it all became painfully real to me. . .when I went to the counter and ordered a "Venti" (that's french I think for "the biggest one you got!") I did not even think about it! It just slipped out before I could stop it! Like a runaway train headed for a cliff! Like a wild tornado out of control. . .I said it!! "Cafe' Mocha, Venti please."

sssscccrreeeeeeeccchhhhhh! Suddenly everything was in slow motion, I was hearing it over and over again in my mind, in MY voice!! My life flashed before my eyes. . .well, not my whole life, just the past 6 months of the downward Starbuck's spiral. . . How did I get here?!? How do I kick this thing?! It's bad when you start adding cocoa mix to your coffee because you can't get to a Starbucks!! I am not sure of the answer to that. . .but I do know one thing. . .I need a coffee! Anyone for Starbucks?